Jul 30 2010
In a Whisper
I’ve had enough, I’m giving up, I see no reason here today,
To Hope and pray that it’ll be ok,
Because theres nothing I can say,
Nothing will make them understand,
Nothing will make them see,
I’m trapped inside this dark black hole,
And it’s me and only ME!
Nothing will help to ease the pain,
Nothing will i say will make me sane,
they cannot win, they need to see,
that I have changed,
That this is me
I’m simply the beginning of my end,
I don’t need help, I don’t need friends,
I’m dying slowly inside and out,
And you don’t even know what deaths really about,
So just go away, leave me alone,
I’m more than happy here on my own,
I’m fine with death, I don’t need you,
And then I whispered Yes I Do…
hmmm personally I think the last line should be “but silently I whisper yes I do…” but overall this is a great poem
I agree with Paulo about the last line but the rest of the peom is really great. =]
This was an amazing poem. I do this the last line could have been better different, but if you change it, it wouldn’t be your poem. Leave it how it is, its perfect. Great job.
threw the deepest part of my life I was there and then I whispered Yes I Do
Love this piece, short and… Well I’d say sweet, but how about poignant…
I think this poem is really cute and I think the last line is absolutely perfect as is!
xoxo