Dec 15 2010
Maybe you just dont get it
Why confuse me.. when all I want is you..
Why tell me to move on..
when you really want me to stay…
I will never leave your life..
Unless that is what makes you happy..
I love you unconditionally and my actions have spoke louder than my words..
You simply refuse to see it..
I am your friend will always be your friend..
and I love you whether you want it or not..
I will never again let that be a burden or mess up the friendship we have..
You are far too important to me..
and I hope one day maybe things will change and you
will decide you need me as more than your friend.. your partner in life..
I only ever wanted what was best.. even though at times my emotions
put us apart..
You are my world even when its not fair…
I give you my all and seemingly you take me for granted..
You want everything and yet give nothing..
I wanted commitement but you could not give it..
How can I give something to you.. you say you dont want…
You constantly confuse me and mentally abuse me…
I know you love me..
God help me I love you too..
I love you like no other.. nor will I ever again.. your it thats the end..
Sure I could find someone else so I did not always feel so alone..
but they could never be you… I would never feel like I am home..
I try to do what you want…
and in the end it leaves me crying..
This love hurts thats true.. but its not all on me.. it is on you..
It causes misery only when you let it..
I refuse to keep hurting us both.. cuz quite simply you are not ready..
I stand firm that fate will one day we will cross that path again..
Till then I am working on me..
I wish I could get through to you.. Never ever have I left you..
You always leave me…
Even when you hurt me.. you could always depend on me..
I dont understand why you always give up.. and that is the deepest cut of all..
You give up without even trying..
when all I do is try…
Have you no understanding…
You are the only one for me…
I do not know how much more I can do to show you..
So from now on I will let everything speak for itself..
I want to be what you need…
not a burden to your health…
I do want us to be together..
more than anything you seem to know..
but i cannot let any of this show how can I..
when everytime I do.. you go…
Yes I say alot of words and the ones from the heart I mean them..
Despite how hard this all is I am still here and I do not leave…
Do you know I have never fought this hard or this much to keep anyone in my life?
You are worth it even if you do not see it..
Stress is the only real burden I have…
I do not just want you I need you..
Maybe one day you will realize its a fact..
I need you in my life..
and I am willing to pay whatever the cost..
If there was something I could do to prove it.. just tell me
It wont be a loss..
I do back up my words… till you tell me they have no meaning… or that its not what you want… if you are not clear.. how do i know what to do.. when everything I do seems so wrong..
I have tried to move on but it simply does not work..
but i continue to try at your request..
I dont want to move on but i will move forward with my life..
to pray one day you will realize i love you best..
when you see it not as misery but something to cling onto..
You have no idea what goes on in my head.. at times i wish you knew..
You complete me and I like to think I complete you..
But there is so much you are unwilling to let me do..
You are scared of commitment and i cannot get into your head I dont want to leave you.. you will never lose my friendship..
but whose to say one day a relationship would not work between us.. because
you have not ever been ready so you have never really tried…
Well for your sake and mine.. I will let the distance come between us.. so we may learn each other and grow..
I pray you will stop trying to leave me.. because I simply cannot take that blow..
I just want to be what you need..not a burden.. I wish you could see me for what I really am…
I love you utterly completely but if you cannot see my actions then for that I am sorry.. you may have no idea what I have done for you because I do not like you to feel bad nor know the full extent of what I have done to make sure you were ok and try to make you happy.. cuz that is not what it is about..
I cannot stand us fighting even though we never really do and maybe we should have..
You have enough stress so thats the last thing I wish to be..
I really just want to know you.. learn and grow old with you..
I am sorry for all of the past..
I would like to start brand new.. concentrate on our friendship..
and maybe you will realize that I mean as much to you as you do to me..
If you think my actions do not show it.. how am i to know that you even care if we were to go there… for your actions have never backed up what you have said…
I know the truth of what my heart feels and how it will always be.. you can believe it or choose not to… its your choice one i cannot make for you…
And you get to this point where you get scared and hurt me.. when i am not crazy you have talked about the future and us together.. but that is the past and maybe one day in the future .. for now its day by day…
I do not neglict you.. i try not to seem needy or bring more stress into your life.. I do what I can but it never seems enough.. i am at loss for what I can do..
i have never stopped trying but I guess you are blind and cannot see…
All that really matters is you…
If I really have been there more than anyone else and done all these things to help you.. why cant you just see love is the cause and the reason.. it helps you when you are miserable.. and yes sometimes it causes pain but only because of all the confusion… or maybe i am deluded… my heart is locked and you alone hold the key…
I do not know what else to say.. so maybe I should stop talking…
because I dont think I am getting through..
Our days are not numbered we will always be friends..
I love you .. on that I will defend and you can depend..
IF you want something more than what you told me.. why not just say it..
If you want me one day when your ready.. I will always be there and that is why I can date but it will never mean a thing.. honestly i would rather be alone then to not be with you… and if im not with you .. i can forget children.. but i wont go into all of that…
All I can say is your words only cause me confusion.. your actions I never know what to think… For now I just want to be friends.. so we can let the past go.. get to know each other and then fromt there as you have said who knows..
And I want the pain to stop for so many reasons..
But I have shown you love why cant you ever see the good..
only to focus on the bad…
You are amazing and always will be…
I have faith that you will one day grow into all that I know you can be…
Friendship was built to last especially ours..
and that is why i know that if we ever give ourselves a chance in the future it would last…
But for now we each need to focus on growing and fixing our lives…
I hope and pray one day you will realize how much I really do love you..
because right now I dont think you do and maybe you never have..
We both have our insecurities and i am working on mine.. but when the time comes we have to be more open to discussion… i pray you will want it as much as i do..
For now.. friendship will be our glue… without any expectations of the other.. a simple door remaining open should you one day choose to walk through…
you are my other half whether its as a friend or the other… we need each other.. but i agree the stress for us both has built up walls.. one day i know they will fall.. but for now we have to simply forget about the past so we can live day by day and one day in the future as you have said.. who knows.. but i know damn well i am worth it… whether you ever admit that to me or not… and whether you see it through my actions or not.. you will and always have been worth it to me…
I can no longer post my feelings or words.. because I have said all that I can possibly say.. maybe you will find meaning in all my actions in the future… I bust work myself into an early grave but i guess you simply cant see this.. you mean so much but i feel i mean so little… i will constantly wish for the day you believe.. : /
I am sorry if I put you through to much.. my love is worth it and it grows and changes… maybe one day.. you will truly see it for what it is.. but what meaning does it have my actions or my words if you refuse to see or believe in me.. I do believe in you and i really have never lost faith.. even though in times of anger I have said that I have …
All I can say is sorry.. I never wanted for my love to be a casket… it will continue to grow and change for the better.. and i hope one day i can prove it.. i need you to do the same if you will just hear me.. i need equality.. but for that you have to be ready.. so friends it is no expectations… just a hope and a prayer..
Let the future bring whatever it will because at least with you by my side in friendship I can battle any foe… I cherish all of your advice and words of wisdom even if i have to learn lessons on my own as must you…
this is a long ass poem…but im goin thru the same stuff wit my bf…so i understand
yah i begin to think i will never be able to understand men and they say we are complicated.. R…iiiiiiiiiiiight…
this poem makes me understand so much,but truley I have nothing to say except I give you a five on this poem =]
This honestly, left me speechless.
Reaaally long, but sometimes, to fit in how you truly feel, you can’t use just a few words. Amazing. 5 out of 5, for sure.
Beautifully written. I loved it.
aww this is sooo cute!! when i was reading this it made me think of someone!! :love: all the good times i had with him :love: but it also made me think of the bad times 🙁 and omg i miss him sooo much 🙁 but this was AMAZING!!!!! 😀
why do they never understand?
why do they leave us?
i just dont know anymore
great poem, though
;-( ^_^
I so understand this long ass poem but it is exactly what I am going through…..I hate how men can make women confuse and don’t know what they want….It’s always d woman showing the way !!
Oh my god , i love it.
Saved in my Favorites.
-Amazing poem .
OMG! Suprise me while I read it. Made me think of someone. Its exactly what He’ve said to me, every single words. At first I thought HE wrote it. Good but Sad, I love it. This poem makes me understand so much. Thank you! ;-(
My godness this is long poem but trully worth reading sum ppl jst dnt realise how much they mean to others.I love it
I like this blog very much, Its a really nice situation to read and find information.
I’ve pulled two poems from the final einitdg stages of a mag in the past. One was because of this issue exactly. They kept changing the way they would format the issue, and when it started to mangle the appearance of the poem, I pulled it. The other issue was an intrusive poetry editor, but that is a much longer story. Always tough to give up an acceptance, but it’s not worth it if they kill the poetry or the fun.