Oct 04 2009

Your New Girlfriend

Published by at 6:43 am under Funny Love Poems

Your New Girlfriend Poem

Laura Todd

So ya got a new girlfriend from far across the sea!
Gonna give her all the happiness you never gave to me.

Well you moved in with your girlfriend, I’m supposed to wish you well
But don’t ask me to come meet her ’cause I’d rather be in hell.
It’s like some force of physics, like magnets that repel
like Superman and Kryptonite, it’s like some rancid smell.

I met you on the street today, you didn’t act the same
and every other sentence you spoke your girlfriend’s name
you talked about her hobbies and the clever things she said
and you had to go and tell me just how great she is in bed!

I figured she’d be gorgeous and half as old as me
with a 26 inch waistline and her boobs were double D.
But she was nothing special, she was all that you could get
she was just a lonely hearts girl that you met on the Internet!

Well the years we spent together, that’s water over the dam
I’m getting on with living and I’ve got a brand new plan.
I’m coming to your wedding, and my friends are coming too
they’re all transsexual witches, covered with tattoos!

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One response so far

One Response to “Your New Girlfriend”

  1. Timaon 13 Jan 2010 at 1:13 pm

    [B]null[/B]omg that was so hilarous, that part about her boobs being double d\’s and about the transsexual.

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