Jan 24 2011
Brave faces don’t stop heartbrakes
When you left me I made sure you saw me strong
Independent, I let you free to love your new love
You where happy, so I was also for I loved you
But night came …
As the day died, so did my brave face
Out came the tears of pain, suffering, sorrow.
From my lips lept the crys of internal shattering
I was never the same.
You shun me now, when I need you most
To patch up the wound you left me with.
You don’t help, you are blind
I play my fake feelings out too well.
As I look at a photo of you, I shed tears
I remeber when I could tell you anything
Now I can barely say hello
Without feeling the emptiness of my heart
I know now, I am foolish to still love you
But my heart is not mine to control
If fell, crash and burn,
No stopping it now
Everynight I wish I had not played cool
That I had cried when you left me
But I feel selfish for such thoughts
As I want your happiness more.
Our love was a candle, your flame died
I can see that, but keep the flame of friendship alive
For I need you still to stay a friend
My love
very sad… kinda how i feel in some ways.. the one i loved more than anything in the world was also my best friend and told me to give up all hope of us ever being together and his family the same.. it hurts more than he will ever know.. i guess he didnt care that i loved him still do and always will it hurts when we do not talk.. i am so confused half of the time.. he tells me he wants to be an us.. then he takes it back.. i dont want anyone but him and i too put a brave face on but when i get home.. all i do is cry and feel lost.. misery… pain and suffering seem to be the only friends i have now.. I gave all and now I will soon have nothing. i do not blame him.. i made all the decisions.. i want him to some day be happy even if its not with me… i wont let him know that i will never give my heart to another.. i will act like my life is great.. and put on the biggest act of them all. because everytime i was ever real with him.. he hurt me.. pushed me away.. if he would have but asked me too i would have stayed.. i made mistakes and he did too… I guess he will never see how much my love really was true.. So I guess the future now is uncertain the only thing i do know.. is i will rebuild whats left of my life.. and move on like the zombie i now feel i am.. i hurt every day.. i miss my friend.. but it hurts so much that he asked me to give up on us.. my ma asked me one day why are your eyes bloodshot.. because i have been crying.. i rarely get out of bed… i will probablly lose my car but you see none of it matters to me anymore.. when he was my everything.. and now.. i have nothing… Idk if i could ever be friends with him i want to try because i love him so.. but it hurts everytime it hurts.. he wants me to hide how i feel and i cant do that so easily anymore.. god i just wish i knew what to do
and that is very true : / the title
I am so sorry for your lost. Guys can be so cruel and insensative. But soon you will find the right person, one that cares for you and loves you and won’t break your heart. But it won’t be easy, I have found a person to help me, and I enjoy my time with him, but I do not love him. My heart still goes to my old love, who doesn’t know of my feelings. Though thankfully they are starting to fade, I know I am forever differnt from them.
it would be so much easier if one could decide who to love, wouldnt it? great poem
^_^
Ommggg, i know how you feel, you’re poem is actually amazing 🙂
it’s well sad thoughh x